Chapter 13 - Emma Chose the First Visit
Emma was fifteen when she asked to see Margaret again.
Two years after the porch.
Rachel’s stomach dropped.
She did not say:
no.
“Why?”
“I miss her.”
“Okay.”
“And I want to ask something.”
“What?”
Emma shook her head.
“Her.”
Fair.
The first meeting occurred in a therapist’s office.
Rachel waited elsewhere.
Emma entered alone.
Margaret stood.
Did not approach.
“Hi.”
“Hi.”
Emma sat.
Margaret waited.
Then Emma asked:
“Did you think I was stupid?”
Margaret looked shocked.
“No.”
“Then why did you give me lines?”
Margaret thought.
“Because I thought you were too young to understand what was happening.”
“That sounds like yes.”
Margaret almost defended.
Stopped.
“I thought I understood your feelings better than you did.”
Emma nodded.
“That’s what I meant.”
Then:
“Did you actually think Mom would hurt me?”
“No.”
Immediate.
“Then why did you want a judge to think I felt unsafe?”
Margaret’s eyes filled.
“Because I thought emotional instability would not sound serious enough unless I described how it affected you.”
Emma stared.
“So you made me evidence.”
Margaret closed her eyes.
“Yes.”
That phrase hurt more than:
coaching.
Then Emma asked:
“Why chains?”
Margaret answered without excuse.
“Because I wanted to stop you and I believed I had the right.”
Emma’s jaw tightened.
“Did you know I was scared?”
“Yes.”
“Why didn’t you stop?”
Margaret cried.
“Because by then, stopping would have meant admitting you were right to resist me.”
There.
That was the truth Emma wanted.
Not:
I panicked.
Not:
I loved you.
Control.
Then Emma said:
“I don’t forgive you.”
Margaret nodded.
“I know.”
“I might someday.”
“Okay.”
“I might not.”
Margaret’s face broke.
Still:
“Okay.”
Emma stood.
Then hesitated.
Margaret did not reach for her.
Good.
Emma finally said:
“I miss your pancakes.”
Margaret laughed through tears.
“They were terrible.”
“They were.”
Then Emma left.
Rachel waited outside.
“Well?”
Emma shrugged.
“She’s still annoying.”
Rachel almost laughed.
Then:
“Do you want to see her again?”
“Maybe.”
No schedule demanded.
No reconciliation plan.
Choice returned slowly.
May you like
That was enough.
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