Chapter 3 - When Is It Allowed to Be Today?
He did not answer.
That silence became the seed.
By the time Vanessa got engaged, the family had already chosen Emily as difficult.
Difficult because she corrected them.
Difficult because she left rooms.
Difficult because she would not let Lily be mocked.
Difficult because she said no to photographs when Lily was tired.
Difficult because she refused to bring Lily to adult dinners where people drank too much and called cruelty teasing.
Then came the wedding group chat.
It began, as these things often do, with logistics.
Arrival times.
Dress code.
Shuttle instructions.
Hotel blocks.
Weather.
Then Vanessa started posting jokes.
“Reminder: no toddlers running through my ceremony.”
Someone replied with a laughing emoji.
Lily was six, not a toddler.
Emily ignored it.
Then Vanessa posted:
“Flower girls are for cute, well-behaved kids. Good thing we skipped that tradition.”
Patricia responded with:
“Wise choice.”
Robert added:
“Less risk of small disasters.”
Emily saw the messages and felt her stomach tighten.
Miles was in the chat.
He did not respond.
Emily looked across the couch at him.
“You saw that?”
He rubbed his face.
“She’s stressed.”
“About insulting our daughter?”
“It’s not about Lily.”
Emily held up the phone.
“Who else is the child they keep calling a disaster?”
Miles stood.
“I’ll talk to her.”
“When?”
“After dinner.”
“No. Now.”
His jaw tightened.
“Emily, if I go at her now, she’ll make the whole weekend about drama.”
“She already is.”
He did call Vanessa.
From the porch.
Emily watched through the window.
He spoke quietly.
Too quietly.
A man negotiating with cruelty instead of confronting it.
When he came back in, he said, “She’ll stop.”
“She apologized?”
“She said you’re reading into things.”
Emily laughed once.
“Of course she did.”
“She’ll stop.”
“She’ll hide it.”
Miles looked tired.
That exhausted look used to soften Emily.
Not anymore.
She said, “If they say one word about Lily at that wedding, I’m done.”
Miles looked up.
“With what?”
She did not answer.
Because she did not fully know yet.
Maybe with his family.
Maybe with him.
Maybe with the version of herself that kept hoping one would separate from the other.
The week before the wedding, Lily got sick.
A mild respiratory infection.
Nothing dangerous, but enough fever and coughing that Emily decided she would not attend the ceremony.
Lily cried.
“But I made the picture.”
“I know, sweetheart.”
“Aunt Vanessa won’t get it?”
“I can bring it.”
“Will you tell her I hope she feels like a princess?”
Emily pressed a kiss to her forehead.
“Yes.”
Lily smiled weakly.
“Not a mean princess.”
Emily closed her eyes.
“Not a mean princess.”
On the morning of the wedding, Miles offered to stay home.
Emily wanted to say yes.
She almost did.
Then he looked at his phone, saw seven messages from Patricia, and his face changed into that old trapped expression.
Emily said, “Go.”
“Em—”
“Go. I’ll come for the reception if Lily’s fever stays down and Mrs. Alvarez can sit with her.”
“Are you sure?”
“No.”
He flinched.
She turned away.
“But go anyway.”
She arrived late to the mansion in the deep red gown Patricia had once called “too visible.”
Good.
Let her be visible.
She carried Lily’s drawing in a cream envelope.
Vanessa saw her near the entrance and smiled with all her teeth.
“Emily. You came.”
“I did.”
“Where’s Lily?”
“Home resting.”
“Oh. Poor thing.”
Emily held out the envelope.
“She made this for you.”
Vanessa looked at it as if Emily had handed her a utility bill.
“How sweet.”
She did not open it.
She passed it to a bridesmaid without looking.
Emily watched the paper disappear into someone’s stack of gifts.
Something in her chest tightened.
Miles came over.
“You look beautiful.”
She looked at him.
“You look nervous.”
He tried to smile.
“My whole family is in one place.”
“Then yes. Dangerous environment.”
His smile faded.
“Please, not today.”
There it was.
The family motto.
Not today.
Not at brunch.
Not at Christmas.
Not during the engagement party.
Not while Dad is tired.
Not while Mom is drinking.
Not while Vanessa is stressed.
Not at the wedding.
Emily looked out toward the manicured hedges.
May you like
“When is it allowed to be today?”
Miles said nothing.
