Chapter 10 - Toby Needed His Own Boundaries Too
Repair could not mean flipping the hierarchy.
Heather refused to turn Toby into the child who now had to lose everything so Brielle could feel chosen.
He was four.
He had done nothing wrong by needing his mother.
So the house developed clearer rules.
Brielle’s room required permission.
Her belongings did not automatically become Toby’s because she was older.
Toby was allowed age-appropriate needs without those needs dominating every family decision.
When he interrupted Brielle, Heather corrected him.
When Brielle mocked him, Heather corrected her.
Same principle.
Different expectations based on age.
No more:
“Just give it to him.”
Instead:
“Ask Brielle.”
Sometimes Brielle said yes.
Sometimes no.
And something surprising happened.
Once “no” became allowed, she started saying yes more often.
May you like
Generosity felt different when it was voluntary.
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